Hello All!

Last night Lizzy went to bed well until I turned the hall light out outside of her room. She kept screaming until I turned it back on. It was after that was fixed that she fell to sleep and slept all night. Yes! I am so glad that she is not waking up anymore. We have not been giving her anything except her current remedy and the Sacc Off 6C. Success!

Lizzy is still being very territorial with Katie and Matthew. She does not mind Howard but the other two little ones are not on her favorites list. She is also craving sugar. She keeps going to the cabinets and asking for cookies. Sorry. No go in this house, she is barking up the wrong tree. Her sugar cravings are something that come and go. I need to try to find something to appease her without overloading her at the same time. Her appetite is fair and hopefully we will have another shift tomorrow. She has music therapy tomorrow so I hope she will be in a better place than the last couple of days.

As of 7 pm Lizzy is still throwing a fit to get her way. Todd has been caving in with her and giving what she wants after she screams. I did it too with the hall light. I call it Cellophane Syndrome.

The cellophane refers to the wrapping around a big sucker. And when we as parents fall for these tactics we are being suckers.  I  know it is hard when you have a child that has been ill, but this is not the case today. It is much more difficult for Todd to change gears like this. I am around her all of the time so I know what the deal is. But I still falter from time to time. Todd doesn’t realize it plus he feels guilty for not being with the kids more. So those two factors are the reason he caves in. I caved in last night with the light to keep the peace. She usually does not want it on so go figure. We’re working on it. All in God’s time it will happen.

After Todd laid down the law with her she is much better. No more screaming and fussing. It takes both parents to stand as a united front for it to work. It is what we have always tried to do. We have succeeded most of the time. But Lizzy is different in Todd’s mind. She is his “Gal Pal”. Some wounds take longer to heal. I pray for Todd everyday and especially his healing.

 This poor guy has endured a lot in his life and female abandonment is at the top of the list. When Lizzy slipped away into her autism Todd was devastated. He was in a tremendous state of denial. But over the last three years we have helped each other a lot. Todd is a very sweet, passionate wonderful man who has helped me become a better person. I want to be better for him and I hope that I can help heal him the same way he helped me. All in God’s time. In typical Todd style he knows that I am exhausted so he volunteered to get up with Howard and whomever else wakes up. This is what I mean, he is just wonderful!

Well I hope and pray for full cooperation tonight. Especially since my Toddo is covering for me. Sweet dreams to all and courage for another day of growth and recovery.

Hello All!

Howard 2011

Lizzy slept very well and woke up in a good mood.

Her baby brother Howard and Baby sister Kathryn were up all night. If you recall they have colds with a runny nose and cough. Here I go again. I was dancing from one room to the next to care for them.

Kathryn was very needy and finally I gave her some Pulsatilla 30C and some herbal ear drops and she finally crashed. Before I administered the Pulsatilla she would not let me leave the room. But she did not want me too close to her either. As I sat on her bed comforting her she lifted her blanket and said “Excuse me, excuse me, EXCUSE ME”.

Yikes, Pulsatilla alright. This kind of behavior is tell-tale. They ask for something and then they don’t want it. It was about 6am when the dance marathon ended.

To say the least I was completely wiped out. Not only did lack of sleep exist but also the energy it takes to provide care for sick loved ones is very draining. Plus I have a tendency to absorb other people’s moods so I need to be very careful. I need to research this and figure out what massage therapists and others do to prevent this. This happens with all of my kids from time to time.  When they are very sick or emotionally distraught I feel it too. People say that I am very intuitive and I know that I can read my kids pretty accurately. My teenaged kids always tell me “How did you know”.  Chalk it up to mothers intuition, or whatever you want. But the result is the same. I can sense things about them on a very deep level.

 As I said this occurrence can wear me out completely. It is curious, I can go and go. I am like a foreign sports car that runs fast and handles well. But I need a lot of tinkering to have those results. Meaning I need to relax, go out to dinner with my husband, dance, pray, have fun and just rejuvenate myself. If I don’t I am sluggish and spewing emotional junk all over those in my environment. This is not good! This is exactly what is happening now. I have been caring for everyone day and night so I am very tired and spent. Plus I have not had the time or the money to indulge in some fun. Hopefully I can slowly get some needed rest and fun and be back in a place that is pleasant for everyone. Took some Sepia and it helped very much. Thank God for this remedy. It is perfect for women like me. If a mom is feeling overwhelmed by all that she does this is one for her.

Lizzy 2010

Back to Lizzy. She was okay throughout the day but she was not at her best. She is throwing fits again and wanting her way constantly. She seems exasperated by everything around her. She might be reacting to my mood or she is displaying an old layer that has come to the surface. For example she has been very jealous of Matthew and anything that he is playing with she wants to have it. She has resorted to fighting with him and trying to pull his hair. It seems like territoriality. Lizzy also has been taking her clothes off at night again. We had an issue with this about 2 years ago when she was on hyoscyamus. Her behavior is less extreme than it was in the past so that is something. She is still very affectionate with me wanting to hug, shake hands and give kisses.  But I can tell by her look and touch that is not feeling too great. Thank God her sleep is still in tact. This has not changed. YES! That was a killer for all of us.  Will have to watch and wait and see what happens next week. Hopefully it will taper off.

Hoping and praying for another night of rest. Sweet dreams to all and strength for another day of recovery.